Here I go getting personal again.
Tonight I caught the first few minutes of the new weight loss show with Jillian Michaels. Amidst her yelling at the family to get their rears in gear at the gym, she said this:
"Why would you chose failure when success is an option?"
Despite the world's loudest dish washer whirring in the background, you could have heard a pin drop in my living room. A minute or two later I turned the tv off and started shutting the downstairs down before I headed upstairs for the night.
But I couldn't stop thinking about this one line.
In school I was unhappy with anything less than an A. In college I always did more than required of me. In my job, I try to approach each task with all I've got. I attempt to be the mom I think my daughter deserves.
And yet, I've been choosing failure. I've been overweight just about as long as I can remember. I've talked myself into and out of diets countless times. I've fallen into bad habits, rationalizing that I'll "change" beginning tomorrow morning.
Why don't I choose success?
Because I think failure is easier.
Because failure is what I know.
Because I think I have more time.
Because success scares me a little.
Because success means the type of hard work I'm not used to.
Because I might fail. Again.
This isn't, believe it or not, one of those "my life changes today" declarations. I will not wake up tomorrow and walk 3 miles before having a breakfast of egg whites and cantaloupe. I will get my free Chick-Fil-A Spicy Chicken Sandwhich tomorrow. And I will probably over indulge at my husband's 30th birthday dinner in a few weeks.
But I WILL wake up tomorrow and look at a sign on my bathroom mirror that reads, "I will choose success. Failure is not an option."
Because I, for once, choose success.
Try and not imagine Chariots of Fire playing in the background. If you've got something, a failure, hanging over your head, I invite you to leave a comment here or email me personally. I'd like to encourage you along your journey to success, too. You'll be in my prayers tonight, friend.